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Why 'To Die Or NOT To Die With Cancer'?

'To die or not to die with cancer' - the subtitle for the Nipples to Kneecaps was, it seems, intuitively chosen although until last week I did not realise that was the case.

Last week I saw some PR copy that had an incorrect subtitle. Instead of to die or not to die with cancer, it had 'to die or live with cancer.' As I corrected it, I began to question it. It came to me, of course, here was yet another example of the mindset that we had consciously employed during that traumatic period in our lives i.e when Steve was given three months to live and sent home to die. Although today I still check my choice of words, I admit that, in this instance, it had happened subconsciously.

Let me explain. If I had written the common phrase 'to die or live with cancer' it would suggest that the question or the choice was: Did Steve want to die with cancer or did he want to live with cancer? Let's unpick this.

'To die with cancer' one wants to die with cancer! Agreed? Of course.

'To live with cancer'...surely that means either you have cancer and are living your life knowing one day soon it will take you or that you are in remission and you hope to keep cancer at bay for the foreseeable future, hopefully a lifetime.... but, to be honest no one wants that either. I mean, no one want 'to live with cancer,' or with inner fear of cancer returning, or with the nagging doubt looming over them every time they feel unwell? In one way, using the phrase 'live with cancer' is keeping the beast of cancer alive in your psyche, smoldering in your subconscious realms especially if you are in remission.

But, I wrote 'to die or not to die.'

Steve chose not to die with cancer or should I say not to die because of cancer. This is very different from choosing to live with cancer. By choosing not to die with cancer, on a subconscious level he was saying, I chose not to die as a result of cancer today or at any point in the future ever! Yes, he knew that one day maybe in 50 - 70 years time he would die, but it would not be with cancer, but because of some other reason, maybe just old age.

He said 'no' to dying; he chose not to die with cancer full stop and he also chose not to live with cancer as the alternative to dying. So, with those decisions made it meant, for Steve, on a subconscious level at least (once he was cancer clear and free), cancer in any form could not wheedle its way back into his body and Steve could focus on living!

The aim being that we did not entertain the idea that cancer would ever be a problem again for Steve's body once it had been kicked well and truly out. A subtle difference in word choice, but it made a great difference on his path to health.

Maybe ask yourself the following questions:

How do I talk about my cancer?

How do my loved ones talk about cancer?

What words do we use and are they helping us on a subconscious level in the battle against cancer?"

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